What Are Your Intentions?

So yesterday yet another friend of mine got engaged.  I believe this is the 5^th one over the course of the last two months. I am so happy for them, just as I am happy for my other four friends.  When you watch your friends get engaged and you are single, it evokes many complicated feelings in you, and over the last few months, I have begun to realize those feelings are somewhat ridiculous.  This day in age there seem to be a lot of negative feelings associated with being single, and I’m not sure why.  When did being single become something to be ashamed of.  My Mom taught me from a young age that it was better to not be in a relationship than to be in a relationship with someone who isn’t good for you, just so you can say you are in a relationship.  In my opinion, it is better to prayerfully await your future husband/wife, than to just date a bunch of random people just so you are “dating.”  It is so important to prayerfully await a great man/woman to enter your life, then to date Mr (or Miss). Joe Cool who doesn’t help you thrive in Christ.  As a person, you need someone who will make you think and helps you grow in your relationship with God.  You have to have someone who is pursuing you for the right reasons and not just for a fling.  One way you can find out truly why someone is pursuing you is by asking.  When a guy or girl starts pursuing you simply ask them “What are your intentions?”  In my opinion, a couple moments of awkward can eliminate a lifetime of heartbreak.  So simply ask and observe and pursue people for the right reasons. 

            Then there is the issue with the animosity the world has associated with being single.  You guys know what I’m talking about… lonely cat lady, old maid, all of those lovely terms.  Almost every movie we watch involves some sort of love story or “infatuation story” where two people have to be together or are super depressed.  Our society is obsessed with love disguised as infatuation.  I am sure you have all seen it on tv or somewhere where a one night stand leads to “love.” I hate to break it to you guys, but that isn’t love, that is infatuation.  As much as I love Grey’s Anatomy, that show is famous for it.  Dr. McDreamy and Meredith, oh yeah textbook relationship based on infatuation.  This is why it is so important to draw close to God and pray for your future husband.  You don’t want to get caught in the infatuation triangle because someone was pursuing you for the wrong reasons and you didn’t know it.  So don’t get in a hurry to get in a relationship, and get in one for the wrong reasons.  And for those of you who think you are in the “friend zone,” personally, I believe there is no such thing as the friend zone.  Every good and God-centered relationship is based on a true and deep friendship.  So if you are single and feeling those single-person blues, stop feeling sorry for yourself.  It just isn’t your time yet.  It is better to be single and wait for someone who truly pursues you in a Godly fashion than to get caught up with a guy or girl who isn’t good for you. Wait for that person who makes you want to be a better person and feeds your love for God.  Wait for that person who loves you the way you deserve to be loved.  What I am here to say is there is nothing wrong with being single. Your time will come.  Just patiently and prayerfully wait for the person who pursues you in a Godly manor…and who knows, they could be sitting next to you right now.  And even if you do become a cat-lady, God will still use you….and frankly, cats are great company.  So have a great day my lovely friends and stay beautiful.

“⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”

1Corinthians 13:4-7